letting go...

Let me start with today's pinspiration:

I will use this as my jumping off point.  I am trying to let go of alcohol (although I am not sure how gracefully I am doing this).  Earlier today when I was out walking the dog, I had a strong craving for the release and escape that comes with drinking.  I was getting ahead of myself, thinking of an upcoming trip to visit my dad and stepmom where I will celebrate my 40th birthday, and trying to think how I will manage this with out alcohol...I mentioned in an earlier post that my dad is a master martini maker and the wine flows like water at their house.  

I continued walking the dog and went to see Into the Woods with my daughter and the feeling/craving passed, which leads me to pinspiration #2

I need to remember that these cravings or feelings will pass and not to succumb to them.  

I still find myself questioning whether or not I really need to quit, which the fact that I am even questioning it, probably means that I need to quit.  Somewhere I was reading  an analogy  akin to this (I can't remember where - I have read so many great blogs and books over the past few days):

I Imagine that someone tells me that I can never have cake again, because it isn't good for me (which I know it's not, but you see where I'm going here), puts me in danger, causes me to make bad choices, etc.    Sure, I'm bummed, but I get on with me life, because it's not a problem...yes, I love cake, but I don't have it every day, it's a nice to have, but given all the negative consequences that come with cake, it just isn't worth it when life has so much more to offer.  There are cookies, pies, doughnuts...

Now I'm in a situation, where I know I shouldn't have alcohol because it isn't good for me, puts me in danger, causes me to make bad choices etc. and I find myself trying to rationalize my way out of it.  You can't tell me that's not problematic.  The fact of the matter is that I like(d) to drink because of the feeling it gave me - the release, the escape, the vacation from myself.

So, now here I am looking to gracefully let go of this thing that is not meant for me...