Weeeellll...today I went to see my therapist who I've been seeing for the past 7 years or so. I started seeing her with my now ex-husband for marriage counseling. While my relationship with my husband did not last, my relationship with my counselor has remained steady.
Today I finally really told her about my drinking history. If she did not already think that I was completely bonkers, I feel fairly certain that she does now. I actually went through my blog and recounted my rock bottoms and recent drinking history with her. She knew some of it, but not nearly all of it, nor did she know the extent of it (the drunk driving, my intoxicated infatuation with cigarette smoking).
The whole process of "coming clean" was kind of illuminative. I don't talk about my drinking habit with non-drinkers, and sharing that information with (who I assume to be) a religious non-drinker was slightly more than mildly uncomfortable, and made me realize that yes, my drinking has been problematic.
Since restarting, after my slip around my 40th birthday festivities, I am 6 days alcohol free, and still completely unsure of where I am going with all of this...one day at a time I guess.
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